Hey ya’ll! Today’s blog is going to act as a transcript for the youtube video I am posting titled Night Stand Talks. Night Stand Talks really aims to let you know that you are not alone in the way that you feel; that your feelings are VALID. The video, of course, ends with gratitude and some affirmations to take with you, especially when you are feelings down or lonely or whatever it is. If you wish to read the words I spoke, then continue on with this blog. Otherwise, Click HERE to watch and listen to Night Stand Talks.
*If I Ever Fall In Love plays in the background* Hey every one! Welcome to Night Stand talks! The goal of this night stand talk specifically, is to let you know that you are not alone. You might be physically isolated and quarantined, but you are not alone. And what I mean by this is that, your feelings are valid, for one, and two, there are thousands, if not millions of people out there that feel the same way as you in this very moment. I think that it is very powerful, especially if you’re like me, to know that you are not by yourself in this; you are not by yourself in those feelings.
We are in the middle of COVID19 quarantine. Some of us are with family, some of us are by ourselves, some of us are with roommates. I personally am with one roommate, but we live on different floors, so it feels like I am pretty much by myself in my New York City box. And a-lot of us have very different feelings about it. There are some people who love being at home with their families and being quarantined together. And then there are people like me who…you can channel your productivity and you can change your energy into positive things for but so long before you start having the night time anxieties and fears creep in, and even the day time anxieties and fears and panic attacks.
Have your moment, take your 15 minutes, 20 minutes to cry anywhere in your room. Take your moment to cry it out, that is totally okay. But let’s acknowledge the difference between having your moment and crying it out, and spirally downhill. I used to spiral. I used to cry and be upset and be sad. Then I would start panicking and would have thoughts of cutting. Then I would actually self harm and it before you know it, it would be out of control. I have had thoughts like this a couple times during this pandemic, but have remembered to bring myself back!
However, you don’t need to spiral! Just because you are crying and you might have had a panic attack or something along those lines, that does not mean you are spirally! It means that you are taking time to feel how you need to feel and that is COMPLETELY OKAY! Call who you have to call, text who you have to text. As long as you are not hurting yourself or someone else, then you are just taking your moment. Anything that you feel, you can come back from. You do not have to let your feelings linger into the next day or into the next week. And sometimes, how you feel might take a day to get over, maybe a couple days or a week to get past depending on the severity of the situation. Of course deaths and break ups and the like take longer. But, the point is, take the amount of time that you need to feel and make sure to come back from that.
In terms of COVID19 stuff, a lot of us are feeling sad and grief around being inside and not having the lives that we used to have. And we have to make sure that we don’t let those moments spiral out of control because we are stuck inside and this is a specific situation that is may not end any time soon.
Often times, we got told when we were younger “what happens in the house, stays in the house”. This leads us to retain our feelings and not really open up a a lot. But because we’re so restricted and we handle things ourselves and distract ourselves, then when the emotions do come out, they come out fierce and they come out strong! Personally, I know that my emotions, because I bottle them up for so long and channel my anger and aggression into cooking and cleaning and writing and the like, come out strong and in the form of panic and rageful tears. Just a year and a half ago, they would come out in the form of self harm. So for all of you who are used to holding onto your emotions until they burst, and those of you who suffer from mild anxiety or those of you who just cannot seem to figure out your emotions right now. I am letting you know that YOU ARE NOT ALONE in your feelings and that your feelings are valid.
It is natural to grieve for loss. It is natural to be angry about loss. It is natural to be sad about loss. Quarantine has given us so many reasons to grieve and I feel like a lot of times, people think “if someone else has a problem that is bigger than mine, then my problem is invalid”. But both problems are valid. Theirs and yours because you both are experiencing your own personal feelings toward them! And we try to, especially during this time, contain our grief because “there are bigger problems in the world”. But you still deserve to feel and take that space. Your feelings are valid today, and they were valid yesterday!
However, when we come out of these feelings and out of that moment, even if it was a spiral, it is really important to count your blessings and remember what you are grateful for! If we do not remember what we are grateful for and we do not count our blessings, we end up getting stuck in a negative space. And I cannot speak on people’s forms of depression, but it is hard to come out of.
Here are some things you can be grateful for, as well as affirmations you can say to yourself after reading this or watching the video.
- Be grateful for your health, your familys health, and your friends health
- Be grateful for another day. In these times, tomorrow is not promised.
- Be grateful that you have the financial stability to watch this video and read this blog.
These are things that you have and that you can leverage. Now, I am huge on affirmations, so here are three things that I want you to tell yourself after reading this blog or watching this video.
- I AM LOVED!
Tell yourself this. Even if you do not feel it for whatever, tell yourself. I AM LOVED. The fact that you are reading this blog or watching this video, I have love for you. You are a human, you are alive, and you deserve love!
2. I WILL GET THROUGH THIS!
Tell yourself that! This too shall pass. It is written in the subways, the bible! Your parents said it. Even if you are having an awful day and you’ve been crying, tell yourself that you will get through it. Tell yourself this over and over again until you believe it, until you stop crying, until you are able to fall asleep. You will get through this, whatever it is!
3. I FREE MYSELF FROM PAST HURTS!
Free yourself from the damage that has happened today. Free yourself from the damage that happened yesterday. FORGIVE YOURSELF. It is okay. Do not let todays pain rob you of tomorrows joy. Don’t let yesterdays pay rob you of todays joy. Tell yourself this over and over again. Say them after reading this, say them in the morning. If you cried all day or binged ate everything, it’s fine. Forgive yourself. It happened and its over! you must affirm that you are going to move past it and make sure that today is a new reset. You have to affirm the positive in order to believe it.
I hope you enjoyed today’s Night Stand Talks. If you have affirmations, I would love to see them in the comments. I want to know how you are doing during this quarantine and what you are doing to get yourself through!
If you liked this post, leave a comment! If you feel connected and would like to speak more on personal affirmations, contact me on social media or on the contact page!
Positivity, Growth, and All the things,